A few years ago, O told me this.
It was another one of those strange meetings with him that I am almost
accustomed; he just flew back from the otherside of the planet and
landed in K-town.
He was telling me about his philosophy of life again, and death. It was
very Hitler-esque (I mean it completely as a complement. Everybody who
knows him thinks so as well.) He prodded, he bellowed, he spoke in his
softest voice, he thundered out anthems.
He looked at me without blinking. Then he gave the punchline. "Angst is
not cool when you're thirty." Then he stopped and faded to silence.
I guess it made sense. Life is for the living.
That brooding, menacing, alienated anger ... Well, it was some 90's
movie fad. All those movie guys we modeled ourselves after, Keanu,
Ethan, Johnny moved to bigger and better blockbusters. The whole was a
sham and fools were lead to flounder.
An I am looking forward to my life now. Post-quarter-century. And,
however bleak, must wean myself off angst. It won't be cool for much
longer anymore.
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